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Official SquareOffs Page of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K).
Which is your favored experiment?
MST3K Asked by MST3K
10/23/2020

Which is your favored experiment?

38%
Swamp Diamonds

57

62%
Devil Fish WINNER

81

38%
Swamp Diamonds

57 Comments
Gabriel D
2
Gabriel D

What can I say? It's got a good short.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 22:35:28 -0500

Reply
Matthew DeBarger
2
Matthew DeBarger

I like both, but this one hasn't been in circulation as often.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:20:31 -0500

Reply
ANTIFA™ Inc. Regional Distribution Manager
2
ANTIFA™ Inc. Regional Distribution Manager

I need to learn what NOT to do on a date!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:40:51 -0500

Reply
Robert Webster Caldwell
1
Robert Webster Caldwell

I write Golden Girls fan fiction, and I’ve always wanted a crossover with The Nardo gang.

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 12:48:28 -0500

Reply
Chris Cooke
1
Chris Cooke

Swamp Diamonds's short makes it all worth it. Half the time I enjoy shorts more than actual riffed films.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 07:49:37 -0500

Reply
Hendo
1
Hendo

Beverly Garland. That is all.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 01:17:20 -0500

Reply
Steven Aloyisus Campbell
1
Steven Aloyisus Campbell

Because Devil Fish ate all the Swamp Diamonds!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:38:11 -0500

Reply
Mike Aronow
1
Mike Aronow

OK, this is a tough one because the final freeze frame in Devil Fish is hilarious. But, I have to give it to Swamp Diamonds for the hilarious short, "What to Do on a Date."

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:39:33 -0500

Reply
Matthew Finch
0
Matthew Finch

Oh, bite me. It's fun

Fri, 23 Oct 2020 21:09:59 -0500

Reply
Molly Hansen
0
Molly Hansen

Beverly Garland!!

Thu, 22 Oct 2020 09:24:54 -0500

Reply
Luis Reyes
0
Luis Reyes

Who could forget the bravura performance of Touch (bka Mike) Connors?

Wed, 21 Oct 2020 10:35:53 -0500

Reply
Not Billehecka
0
Not Billehecka

Just for the short alone.

Tue, 20 Oct 2020 15:30:27 -0500

Reply
Honest Jonn
0
Honest Jonn

It's Roger Corman!

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 21:18:57 -0500

Reply
Justin Wingate
0
Justin Wingate

Yeah, I believe this is better.

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 19:03:12 -0500

Reply
Chuck Campbell
0
Chuck Campbell

Beverly Garland and Marie Windsor--nothing else need be said.

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 12:12:27 -0500

Reply
Michael T. Smith
0
Michael T. Smith

Beverly Garland at peak Beverly Garland

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 11:23:19 -0500

Reply
Rob Gullo
0
Rob Gullo

I was thinking...I would have gone with "Batch" Conners

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 04:31:00 -0500

Reply
Brian Edsell
0
Brian Edsell

Because

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 01:24:15 -0500

Reply
Starry Monroe
0
Starry Monroe

Better cast..better riffs!!

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 00:31:26 -0500

Reply
Kim VanHooser
0
Kim VanHooser

Hello? Beverly Garland! Feisty woman Rocks!

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 23:17:11 -0500

Reply
Jacob Flores
0
Jacob Flores

Ooooo,oooo Swamp Diamonds...

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 18:54:42 -0500

Reply
Ben Tobin
0
Ben Tobin

Rogue women get drunk and make shorts! Also kidnap a guy and commit murder! Swamp Diamonds!

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 12:56:07 -0500

Reply
Bill Covington
0
Bill Covington

Well, hell... I tried to change my vote! It's a close call, but I don't mind Roger Corman and Beverly Garland.

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 09:28:08 -0500

Reply
Robert Barger
0
Robert Barger

Beverly Garland. Nuff said.

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 04:40:09 -0500

Reply
Beardo Beatnick
0
Beardo Beatnick

Diamond in the rough!

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 00:15:47 -0500

Reply
Nathan Smith
0
Nathan Smith

Always choose the wiennie roast.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 13:33:02 -0500

Reply
Jon Lid
0
Jon Lid

Oh, Beverly

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 10:57:27 -0500

Reply
David Iacovino Sr.
0
David Iacovino Sr.

I never laughed so much...Fudge Connors, Scrod Connors

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 06:34:41 -0500

Reply
Scott A Burke
0
Scott A Burke

I've seen Devil Fish a million times. I don't think I've seen this one.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 22:29:10 -0500

Reply
Kieran Cowan
0
Kieran Cowan

It's an underrated season 5 episode, and the movie is.. actually pretty fun.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 21:06:44 -0500

Reply
Derek Smith
0
Derek Smith

va va voom

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 21:05:16 -0500

Reply
Matt Morrison
0
Matt Morrison

Beverly Garland in Daisy Dukes.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 20:39:22 -0500

Reply
Hilary Aronow
0
Hilary Aronow

Gotta go with "What to Do on a Date" - one of the show's funniest ever shorts.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:43:19 -0500

Reply
Michael Schiavo
0
Michael Schiavo

Two words: Mike "Touch" Connors. Three words.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 18:22:48 -0500

Reply
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.
0
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.

I guess I like women’s prison escape movies better than random buffalo shots. There’s something good about Devilfish that I don’t remember anymore because the triggering flash shot eclipses it.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:53:58 -0500

Reply
Amber Scaggs
0
Amber Scaggs

I like the short "What to do on a date". And the host segments is pretty good.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:52:17 -0500

Reply
Kathy Vietor
0
Kathy Vietor

Touch Connors!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:29:49 -0500

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David Rogers
0
David Rogers

Weenie roast.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:19:35 -0500

Reply
Gretchen Crumpacker
0
Gretchen Crumpacker

Come on come on now TOUCH me babe! Can’t you see that I am not afraid?

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:15:07 -0500

Reply
Merri Hall Cross
0
Merri Hall Cross

Mike Connors!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:14:45 -0500

Reply
Chuck Coshow
0
Chuck Coshow

Devil fish is painful to watch, while Mannix (Dah-dah-dah-DAH!) and Dodie make for good watching and riffs.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:10:34 -0500

Reply
Phyllis Lanza
0
Phyllis Lanza

Strong female leads, duking it out in the swamp!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:53:25 -0500

Reply
Mark Schmidbauer
0
Mark Schmidbauer

Lucy and Viv in the Big House

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:33:09 -0500

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Kenneth E. Morgan
0
Kenneth E. Morgan

"Devil Fish" has good riffing, but the movie has a very poor attitude towards women.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:06:41 -0500

Reply
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.

Seconded.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:54:43 -0500

Mary Clev
0
Mary Clev

Beverly Garland. The End.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:56:13 -0500

Reply
Josh Ryals
0
Josh Ryals

I remember this as being a pretty good Joel episode. I liked Tom & Gypsy's date.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:51:43 -0500

Reply
Lisamarie Babik
0
Lisamarie Babik

Two words: Beverly. Garland. *purrrrr*

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:46:59 -0500

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Paul Smith
0
Paul Smith

Touch. There’s a dude named Touch in it. And he’s not dubbed. And goofy lady wrestling. But mostly Touch Connors. Oh, and because Beverly Garland runs circles around any Fishy Devil actor.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:46:19 -0500

Reply
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.
☀✌Teresa D. Lee🌺 PG-13 usually.

Seconded! This again as always is a contest between male dominance and female empowerment.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:56:12 -0500

Jon Attema
0
Jon Attema

A handsome man held captive by several beautiful escapees. I feel like this tells us more about Roger Corman than anything else he's done.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:42:20 -0500

Reply
Gerald Hough
0
Gerald Hough

Basically because it has the best short in my opinion- What to Do On a Date.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:42:18 -0500

Reply
Masque of the Redrua Death
0
Masque of the Redrua Death

Advantage: Mannix

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:39:39 -0500

Reply
Casey Killingsworth
0
Casey Killingsworth

Eh, I voted for Mikes' episode yesterday and I was always a bit more partial to Joels' era anyway. Besides, I wasn't a huge fan of Devil Fish.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:37:40 -0500

Reply
MST3K
0
MST3K

Swamp Diamonds includes iconic short, "What to Do on a Date." No contest.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:36:21 -0500

Reply
Melissa Mlynek-Peplinski
0
Melissa Mlynek-Peplinski

I saw the movie poster with a woman holding a gun to a tied up man! Tacky!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:35:31 -0500

Reply
Mikey Elms
0
Mikey Elms

Devil Fish is a snoozefest.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:29:58 -0500

Reply

62%
Devil Fish

81 Comments
Robert Jindra
2
Robert Jindra

Just because you CAN edit, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:56:30 -0500

Reply
✖️ Ryan H 🎮
2
✖️ Ryan H 🎮

It's Euro-funny.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:13:31 -0500

Reply
Bruce Turbeville
2
Bruce Turbeville

Because they are so obviously in Florida, America, where they drive pickup cars...!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:58:15 -0500

Reply
Jonah Gregory
2
Jonah Gregory

"Underwater fight scenes are the drum solos of movies."

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:45:41 -0500

Reply
Barbara L. LeMaster
1
Barbara L. LeMaster

Because the line "just because you can edit doesn't mean you should" still makes me giggle. Plus, this is basically Sharktopus years before Roger Corman thought of the idea.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:41:51 -0500

Reply
Ken Gorski
Ken Gorski

"just because you can edit doesn't mean you should" should be printed as large banners and hung on front of every college film school.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 15:27:38 -0500

Jay Rambo
1
Jay Rambo

I missed going on a cruise in May, so this should make up for it, right?

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:40:37 -0500

Reply
Josh Colletta
Josh Colletta

As long as you don't mind the fresh Mrs. Dash air!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:57:21 -0500

Newt Calkins
1
Newt Calkins

Iris Peynado as Sandra. Also, pssshhhhhttttt glug glug glug "electrician"

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 18:05:24 -0500

Reply
Troy Thomas
1
Troy Thomas

This one was much easier. Devil Fish is an underrated classic, while Swamp Diamonds is drab, dull and uninvolving. In other words, your average Corman episode.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:55:28 -0500

Reply
John Gaines
1
John Gaines

Get your flamethrowers out, grab a stick of Juicy Fruit!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:56:19 -0500

Reply
ThePeronah
1
ThePeronah

Two words: Buffalo Shot

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:45:25 -0500

Reply
Ken Gorski
Ken Gorski

He's hanging out the old Evinrude,

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 15:24:17 -0500

Ben
1
Ben

A Beer Guzzling boat captain, a stupid monster based off jaws, and over dubbed Italians as people in Miami, what’s not to love ?

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:30:00 -0500

Reply
Joe Pipkin #SaveVentureBros
1
Joe Pipkin #SaveVentureBros

The first time the show got censored came out of left field!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:50:26 -0500

Reply
Evan Schmalz
1
Evan Schmalz

I'm pleased at things

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:50:03 -0500

Reply
Jackson Munden
1
Jackson Munden

My very first episode of Mike hosting!!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:42:49 -0500

Reply
Alicia Rodriguez
1
Alicia Rodriguez

The over the top plot makes the decision to vote Devil Fish super easy. "PETER FRAMPTON!"

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:42:27 -0500

Reply
Kali11CatsEye!
1
Kali11CatsEye!

I love goofy monster movies, even silly looking devil fishies....

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:41:29 -0500

Reply
Sean McDonnell
1
Sean McDonnell

The movie so nice they gave it a title card twice. It's just good dopey fun

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:38:08 -0500

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Michael Pullmann
1
Michael Pullmann

Because I love a good Italian cheese.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:37:31 -0500

Reply
Corey Core Grundstein
0
Corey Core Grundstein

One of my favs!

Fri, 23 Oct 2020 11:03:08 -0500

Reply
Ben Murphy
0
Ben Murphy

Click. Glug glug glug glug glug. Aaaah. Click. Glug glug glug glug glug.. Aaaaah. And all the beautiful Florida scenery.

Wed, 21 Oct 2020 23:59:58 -0500

Reply
Ashley
0
Ashley

I feel European when I watch it.

Tue, 20 Oct 2020 21:27:49 -0500

Reply
Myrrh Kingwell
0
Myrrh Kingwell

This movie is so bad, it needs to be in the turkey day lineup just to keep a person humble

Tue, 20 Oct 2020 21:09:51 -0500

Reply
Raven Cain
0
Raven Cain

*psht* glug glug glug glug glug glug *psht* glug glug glug glug glug .... *psht* glug glug glug glug glug ... *psht*

Tue, 20 Oct 2020 17:59:58 -0500

Reply
Greg Gancho
0
Greg Gancho

Nothing in it makes any sense, in way that's fun and entertaining.

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 14:50:31 -0500

Reply
Beathil Tenchijeff
0
Beathil Tenchijeff

Mike

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 12:24:11 -0500

Reply
Sara Lipowitz
0
Sara Lipowitz

I KNOW!

Mon, 19 Oct 2020 11:13:47 -0500

Reply
Eric Tacti
0
Eric Tacti

Team Mike, Bill and Kevin!

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 17:52:26 -0500

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Jared Hutton
0
Jared Hutton

6 million dollar creeper

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 14:52:41 -0500

Reply
Sam Lovelace
0
Sam Lovelace

It's so silly!

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 06:21:43 -0500

Reply
Aabra Jaggard
0
Aabra Jaggard

Dangerously Italian

Sun, 18 Oct 2020 00:02:36 -0500

Reply
Wade Mintz
0
Wade Mintz

It's one I haven't seen

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 23:30:17 -0500

Reply
Chris James
0
Chris James

You know why.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 22:42:48 -0500

Reply
Eviliz
0
Eviliz

Swamp diamonds gives me leech flash backs

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 20:29:30 -0500

Reply
Paul Hyson
0
Paul Hyson

both are amazing, but this is the less well-known, and it is not Swamp Diamonds

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 20:11:33 -0500

Reply
Dan Asnis
0
Dan Asnis

Roger Corman is no match for the Italians when it comes to cheese.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 19:35:15 -0500

Reply
Tj Joulwan
0
Tj Joulwan

Becuz devil fish

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 19:30:30 -0500

Reply
Robert Shelley
0
Robert Shelley

Had a girlfriend who I now hate actually rented this movie before I saw it on MST 3K

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 19:07:37 -0500

Reply
Richard Cooney
0
Richard Cooney

Boy, am I in Florida.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 17:58:36 -0500

Reply
Dan Wiencek
0
Dan Wiencek

Of course I am American and not Italian! I drive a truck!

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 17:52:17 -0500

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Janie Davis
0
Janie Davis

i like this movie,and them guys are nuts.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 17:15:55 -0500

Reply
Chris Labye
0
Chris Labye

Of course some America are not Italian I drive a truck

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 16:04:08 -0500

Reply
Ken Gorski
0
Ken Gorski

Guess I'm the 100 person to make the “just because you can edit" joke now I'm condemned to play Seaquest on an Atari with drink boat captains and mobbed-up doctors.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 15:11:52 -0500

Reply
Lillian Lasher
0
Lillian Lasher

Oh, I suppose I'll accept a LITTLE bit of sex from you, go ahead."

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 13:58:02 -0500

Reply
Ashley Jo Verity
0
Ashley Jo Verity

Who doesn't like lab experiments gone horribly wrong?

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 12:37:04 -0500

Reply
jeff lingenfelter
0
jeff lingenfelter

No contest. Devil Fish by a mile.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 12:28:18 -0500

Reply
Sarah Gibbs
0
Sarah Gibbs

Much better music

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 12:07:40 -0500

Reply
Brian Murphy
0
Brian Murphy

Swamp Diamonds is currently on and I haven't seen Devil Fish in awhile.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 11:39:23 -0500

Reply
E. A. Bruce
0
E. A. Bruce

Because we're from Europe! Heh heh... Hee hee... Hahaha haha...

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 11:29:39 -0500

Reply
Tim Swartz
0
Tim Swartz

Devil and fish. Two words when combined mean awesome movie.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 10:52:56 -0500

Reply
Julian Kennedy
0
Julian Kennedy

I like the Italian... I mean Floridian ladies.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 09:19:02 -0500

Reply
Beth Whitmore
0
Beth Whitmore

Mad scientists and blood thirsty monsters what could be better?!

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 09:11:55 -0500

Reply
Walt Fletcher
0
Walt Fletcher

Give me bad effects for a monster anyday

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 09:01:45 -0500

Reply
Wyldstaar Studio
0
Wyldstaar Studio

The failure of Italian knock-offs like Devil Fish are always entertaining. Swamp Diamonds was made early in Roger Corman's career, so he hadn't yet learned how to get the most bang for his buck.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 08:05:51 -0500

Reply
James Paparella
0
James Paparella

Swamp Diamonds is tawdry and not weird enough for M st3k.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 07:45:46 -0500

Reply
Sam LaMonica
0
Sam LaMonica

"I kno~ow!"

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 06:50:13 -0500

Reply
Elio Concepcion
0
Elio Concepcion

Because Florida is gross.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 06:31:53 -0500

Reply
Leonore Bongert
0
Leonore Bongert

There's just something about the silliness of Devil Fish that makes it a joy to watch.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 06:28:38 -0500

Reply
Susan N Sean Morath
0
Susan N Sean Morath

Because I dearly love the show and love this episode.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 04:38:19 -0500

Reply
Nicholas Volosin
0
Nicholas Volosin

Because I can't eat swamp diamonds.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 01:59:53 -0500

Reply
Alex Mckaie
0
Alex Mckaie

Fun crazy film with some great riffs.

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 01:15:36 -0500

Reply
Hawk
0
Hawk

Because this is where the fish lives (wrong episode I know, but it still fits)

Sat, 17 Oct 2020 00:08:30 -0500

Reply
Josh L
0
Josh L

Cause I voted for a Joel ep last time. All things in balance!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 23:47:24 -0500

Reply
Awghost 5
0
Awghost 5

I just liked the episode better. It's not that deep.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 23:10:57 -0500

Reply
P.J Quezada
0
P.J Quezada

For the Italian filter and dolphins in space ships.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 22:33:56 -0500

Reply
Tiffany Fricke
0
Tiffany Fricke

I’ve never seen this one. Is it anything like the piranha one that Jonah did?

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 22:08:15 -0500

Reply
Mark Vidreiro
0
Mark Vidreiro

Tough one, but I enjoy this one better.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 21:43:50 -0500

Reply
Last_Starfytr
0
Last_Starfytr

Comes down to a better movie if that makes any sense at all. The swamp diamonds women are so grating I can barely keep watching even with the hilarious riffing

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 21:26:02 -0500

Reply
Rebekah Nelson
0
Rebekah Nelson

"Just because you can edit doesn't mean you should."

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 20:57:06 -0500

Reply
KozyTimeOnline
0
KozyTimeOnline

Deep lucifered potatoes is now a family recipe.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 20:53:35 -0500

Reply
j c
0
j c

My favorite Itloridian movie

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 20:16:05 -0500

Reply
Ricardo Silkworth
0
Ricardo Silkworth

Italians pretending to be a Floridians ... nuff said

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 20:09:00 -0500

Reply
Penny Wise the danceing clown
0
Penny Wise the danceing clown

Idk I just love mst3k the renewal

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 19:05:07 -0500

Reply
Howard Sauertieg
0
Howard Sauertieg

This is a fast moving and fun episode

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 18:41:28 -0500

Reply
Jean Thomas
0
Jean Thomas

Pleasant scenery, super funny!

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 17:26:07 -0500

Reply
Josh Colletta
0
Josh Colletta

I always get a kick out of one of my favorite school field trip destinations (the Miami Seaquarium) being used as the setting for a Eurofunny JAWS knockoff.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 16:28:28 -0500

Reply
Gregory Lannom
0
Gregory Lannom

italian pelvises.

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:43:36 -0500

Reply
Zoltan Wilson
0
Zoltan Wilson

It's a solid film with terrible acting. I live it

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:41:36 -0500

Reply
Chelsea McQuaid
0
Chelsea McQuaid

Here, fishy fishy fishy

Fri, 16 Oct 2020 15:37:46 -0500

Reply
Which invention would you rather receive as a gift?

Which invention would you rather receive as a gift?

The Big Head

10

Johnny Longtorso

11

The Big Head

10 Comments
Jim Hanson
3
Jim Hanson

I want people to see me and go "who's that guy with the biiig head?"

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:20:42 -0600

Reply
TéléDex-Bracewell #SiaDoesntSpeakForUs #BLM
1
TéléDex-Bracewell #SiaDoesntSpeakForUs #BLM

I think this is more of a novelty gift, that will look good on a wall, rather than my head.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:37:24 -0600

Reply
Arlene Harris
1
Arlene Harris

the big head comes complete. Johnny long torso has so many add ons.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:21:56 -0600

Reply
James Scoggin
1
James Scoggin

Perfect for keeping those annoying salespeople away!

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:14:42 -0600

Reply
black and white spies
0
black and white spies

Pixar

Mon, 15 Mar 2021 22:43:11 -0500

Reply
Ben
0
Ben

I want people to see me coming before I’m there!

Wed, 30 Dec 2020 19:16:58 -0600

Reply
Troy Wood
0
Troy Wood

I don't do much algebra, but in the off chance I needed to, it'd be handy to have the big head around.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 15:30:35 -0600

Reply
Derek Smith
0
Derek Smith

Ummm... because? Yeah, because! That's right ummm yeah... because... n stuff. I have spoken! Pretty much. Or because bigger head means I can eat bigger cheez-its?

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 14:22:25 -0600

Reply
Sitting Duck
0
Sitting Duck

Though I really want Mr. Mashed Potato Head.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:56:46 -0600

Reply
Michael Kilgore
0
Michael Kilgore

If anyone ever told me in response to my grandiose plans that I've got the big head, I'd reply, "How did you know?"

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:31:42 -0600

Reply

Johnny Longtorso

11 Comments
Russell Boyer
1
Russell Boyer

With realistic Action Batch™!

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 16:42:58 -0600

Reply
Kirsty The Hermit
1
Kirsty The Hermit

Look at how long his torso is! It's so long! That's cool.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:12:45 -0600

Reply
Casey Killingsworth
1
Casey Killingsworth

more practical

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:09:35 -0600

Reply
Leeann Key
0
Leeann Key

I have a long torso, and it would be nice to have an action figure that is like me.

Thu, 14 Jan 2021 21:45:41 -0600

Reply
Jonathon Hoff
0
Jonathon Hoff

Storage issue

Sat, 02 Jan 2021 09:28:15 -0600

Reply
Jennifred Hollybright
0
Jennifred Hollybright

I collect action figures

Thu, 24 Dec 2020 08:38:31 -0600

Reply
wthvideoproduction
0
wthvideoproduction

I love Johnny Longtorso and I would have loved to have had it when I was a kid.

Thu, 24 Dec 2020 07:28:28 -0600

Reply
Bussho Lahn
0
Bussho Lahn

But only his realistic action batch

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 22:43:53 -0600

Reply
Nate Butler
0
Nate Butler

He's long!

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 20:12:13 -0600

Reply
Diana Psotka
0
Diana Psotka

ACCESSORIES!

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:25:50 -0600

Reply
Claire Jumper
0
Claire Jumper

The big head is a little creepy.

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 13:10:11 -0600

Reply
Which person would you rather host for the holidays?

Which person would you rather host for the holidays?

Mitchell

10

Rowsdower

32

Mitchell

10 Comments
Denise Litostansky-Crawford
1
Denise Litostansky-Crawford

My, my, my Mitchell. He'll clean up all the leftovers.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 14:49:03 -0600

Reply
Jeff Rohr
0
Jeff Rohr

I'm pretty sure this is Jack Black.

Wed, 02 Jun 2021 10:21:20 -0500

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Matthew Finch
0
Matthew Finch

Two words: Not Canadian Just kidding. He's just so lovable...

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 20:50:25 -0600

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Vega$ Chicken
0
Vega$ Chicken

From a guest standpoint he would probably be low maintenance as long as you had plenty of beer.

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 21:43:22 -0600

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Doc Gregory
0
Doc Gregory

It's Joe Don Baker, need I say more. My My My My Mitchell.

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 21:10:23 -0600

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Gordon Rhys
0
Gordon Rhys

He'll bring the Schlitz. Kiss of the hops, baby.

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 07:00:56 -0600

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Dee Schendel
0
Dee Schendel

I think Mitchell would be a chill drunk at the holiday celebrations & mildly entertaining. Rowsdower, probably an angry drunk, unpredictable with his PTSD because of that cult thing & kind of scary. I'm all into excitement, but not at Christmas.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 18:54:52 -0600

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Wes Pledger
0
Wes Pledger

Mitchell! One of the first mst3k’s I ever saw!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:36:53 -0600

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Brian John Davidson
0
Brian John Davidson

It would be easy to toss Mitchell out in the snow once the visit palled. Which would take about five minutes. I'd give him an orange for the journey.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:21:14 -0600

Reply
Alexandrea Cyril Niell
0
Alexandrea Cyril Niell

My, my, my, my house guest.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:10:56 -0600

Reply

Rowsdower

32 Comments
Vern Pike
3
Vern Pike

Do you want your house to smell like Canadian Bacon mixed with failure, or baby oil mixed with failure? Easy choice. Plus, Rowsdower brings with him a sidekick and a gaggle of BDSM cultists to liven up your evening. What has Mitchell ever done like that?

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:20:42 -0600

Reply
Ben
2
Ben

Denim, mullet, beer and a sidekick . Yeah this guy was built to save us all and the world!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 17:50:11 -0600

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Graham Connor
Graham Connor

Amen!

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 16:14:53 -0600

Marion Nanette Holmes
2
Marion Nanette Holmes

They are both unappealing, but I grew up in rural Maine in the woods, so I could deal with his rural Canadianness, and I would be up for map finding-behinding and a beer on the sun with Rowsdower.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:14:17 -0600

Reply
Opia R. Castle
2
Opia R. Castle

Rowsdower saves us and saves all the world. Mitchell just drinks, boinks, and yells at kids.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:11:23 -0600

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Andrew Brandt
1
Andrew Brandt

Rowsdower may have a conflicted past, but he ends up doing the right thing. Mitchell is a scumbag. The festive beeramid we would construct brings tears to the eyes!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:51:31 -0600

Reply
4 Seasons Total Landscaping's Head Arborist
1
4 Seasons Total Landscaping's Head Arborist

Does Mitchell rock a totally awesome jean jacket like Rowsder? Nay!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:41:25 -0600

Reply
Justin Wingate
1
Justin Wingate

Say what you can, at least he isn't Joe Don Baker.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:21:06 -0600

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M Doyle
1
M Doyle

I want to find out if there’s beer on the sun. Rowsdower will get me there.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:09:33 -0600

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Noble Lashley
1
Noble Lashley

I honestly couldn't decide. It just came down to the fact that it's more fun to say "Rowsdower"

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:02:52 -0600

Reply
Mira Gutoff
0
Mira Gutoff

He'll get us that beer on the sun.

Tue, 22 Dec 2020 22:52:55 -0600

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sean grady
0
sean grady

We only have to deal with Rowsdower once. I would fear dealing with Joe Don morphing from Mitchell to Final Justice in my house. The sacrifice would be too great! 😂

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 07:53:22 -0600

Reply
Kate Halleron
0
Kate Halleron

At least he TRIES.

Wed, 16 Dec 2020 17:47:52 -0600

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Josh Brown
0
Josh Brown

Zap may be an out of shape, gruff old ass, but he's not as prone to violence without provocation as Mitchell. I feel like we could all just sit around drinking Crown Royal and have a good time. Mitchell would start a fight.

Wed, 16 Dec 2020 07:48:04 -0600

Reply
NealyPlum Gamer
0
NealyPlum Gamer

I mean, once you hear about baby oil Mitchell... Ugh... Yeah Ros has my vote

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 17:21:21 -0600

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Graham Connor
0
Graham Connor

Excuse me...I’m Canadian!

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 16:13:05 -0600

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Brock Barber
0
Brock Barber

Kick back a few brews, beat up some evil cultists, talk about our boy Csonka, who could ask for more?

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 15:18:21 -0600

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Trevor Moses
0
Trevor Moses

I have enough beer.

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 14:04:44 -0600

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Aaron Noble
0
Aaron Noble

Maaan, I basically AM Rowsdower.

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 10:29:43 -0600

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Rick Halm
0
Rick Halm

Rowsdower will only drink my beer and pass out. Mitchell will shoot me.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 21:51:10 -0600

Reply
David Schmidt
0
David Schmidt

Rowsdower may not be cultured, but he's quiet and seems like he might bathe. You can practically smell Mitchell through the screen...

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 20:56:30 -0600

Reply
Newt Calkins
0
Newt Calkins

Rowsdower brings his own beer. And being Canadian, he's naturally more fun in the snow.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 20:30:01 -0600

Reply
Warren English
0
Warren English

The mullet.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 20:25:37 -0600

Reply
M'Hael Adam McMorgann
0
M'Hael Adam McMorgann

Rowsdower's rough around the edges, but at least he'd try to do right by the kids. Mitchell would show up with a cheap hooker and scream obscenities at the kids in the room

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 20:23:20 -0600

Reply
Troy Wood
0
Troy Wood

Mitchell would eat all your food, do unspeakable things to your toilet, and then haul the entire family down to the station on Christmas morning for some minor infraction he noticed while snooping around the house for more gravy. All except for grandma... grandma has to walk. Bite me, Mitchell.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 19:23:26 -0600

Reply
Kerrin Dworkowski
0
Kerrin Dworkowski

We could talk about beer on the sun!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 19:12:22 -0600

Reply
John Arminio
0
John Arminio

I can barely say the name "Rowsdower" without giggling. He brings mirth like Santa Claus, even if he smells like stale cigarettes and flat beer rather than sugarplums and roasted chestnuts.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 18:16:47 -0600

Reply
Jeremy Nilson
0
Jeremy Nilson

Food!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 16:17:26 -0600

Reply
Zachariah Mason
0
Zachariah Mason

Because i want him to drink something other than beer!!!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 16:13:26 -0600

Reply
CaptEoNinja83
0
CaptEoNinja83

My family and I LOVE this man!

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:38:15 -0600

Reply
Andrew Thomas
0
Andrew Thomas

He’s lumpy, but he’s a nice guy. Mitchell’s too sleazy for me.

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 15:19:51 -0600

Reply
MST3K
0
MST3K

Cult stories > cop stories

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 14:46:08 -0600

Reply
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