Official SquareOffs Page of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Currently featuring the Turkey Day Tournament 2022! Your votes will decide four of the episodes shown on this year's Turkey Day Marathon.
Which invention would you rather receive as a gift?
MST3K Asked by MST3K
1,751 Votes

Which invention would you rather receive as a gift?

The Big Head

15

Johnny Longtorso

28

The Big Head

15 Comments
Jim Hanson
3
Jim Hanson

I want people to see me and go "who's that guy with the biiig head?"

Reply
TéléDex-Bracewell #SiaDoesntSpeakForUs #BLM
1
TéléDex-Bracewell #SiaDoesntSpeakForUs #BLM

I think this is more of a novelty gift, that will look good on a wall, rather than my head.

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Arlene Harris
1
Arlene Harris

the big head comes complete. Johnny long torso has so many add ons.

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James Scoggin
1
James Scoggin

Perfect for keeping those annoying salespeople away!

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Bryan Kearney
0
Bryan Kearney

Change my name to Todd and get some Monsters for my band.

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robot 'spooky' cat
0
robot 'spooky' cat

Just wanna be that guy with the big head.

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Doug Breese
0
Doug Breese

The song... the song

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Mary Pat Campbell
0
Mary Pat Campbell

it's a really big head!

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Aaron Bellante
0
Aaron Bellante

It's funny. Cause its...bigger than a normal sized head.

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Ben
0
Ben

I want people to see me coming before I’m there!

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Troy Wood
0
Troy Wood

I don't do much algebra, but in the off chance I needed to, it'd be handy to have the big head around.

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Derek Smith
0
Derek Smith

Ummm... because? Yeah, because! That's right ummm yeah... because... n stuff. I have spoken! Pretty much. Or because bigger head means I can eat bigger cheez-its?

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Sitting Duck
0
Sitting Duck

Though I really want Mr. Mashed Potato Head.

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Michael Kilgore
0
Michael Kilgore

If anyone ever told me in response to my grandiose plans that I've got the big head, I'd reply, "How did you know?"

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Johnny Longtorso

28 Comments
Russell Boyer
2
Russell Boyer

With realistic Action Batch™!

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Melinda Hosh-Miller
1
Melinda Hosh-Miller

He's the man who comes in pieces!

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Karen Crockett
1
Karen Crockett

Mostly because of the theme song. "The man who comes in pieces" la la la

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Kirsty The Hermit
1
Kirsty The Hermit

Look at how long his torso is! It's so long! That's cool.

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Aaron Noble
0
Aaron Noble

The cost going into one figure is really expensive.

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Jack Chaisey
0
Jack Chaisey

This may be hard for you to understand, but there is no conspiracy. Nobody is in charge. It, it's a headless blunder operating under the illusion of a master plan. Can you grasp that? Big Brother is not watching you.

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A Weis
0
A Weis

Because longtorso

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Ryan Hollist
0
Ryan Hollist

I already have a big head. Literally, my hat size is a men's large.

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Gayle Gordon
0
Gayle Gordon

He's the man who comes in pieces

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Micah Billet Neff
0
Micah Billet Neff

So I can sing the song....in parts!

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Tom Blackburn
0
Tom Blackburn

Slightly more portable

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Johnny My name is
0
Johnny My name is

Promotes responsible kitbashing!

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Heather M Perkins
0
Heather M Perkins

My head is already gigantic

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Corey Core Grundstein
0
Corey Core Grundstein

No where to put the big head lol

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Drab Art Stew
0
Drab Art Stew

Because short torsos are for the weak!

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Damian Miller
0
Damian Miller

sponduics man, sponduics

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Matt Towler
0
Matt Towler

He comes in peace! Er, pieces

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Tony González
0
Tony González

I'd want to mount the big head on the wall and my wife would have a fit, so Johnny it is...

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N'EliG-G-GHOST!
0
N'EliG-G-GHOST!

I mean, that theme song, right?

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Leeann Key
0
Leeann Key

I have a long torso, and it would be nice to have an action figure that is like me.

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wthvideoproduction
0
wthvideoproduction

I love Johnny Longtorso and I would have loved to have had it when I was a kid.

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Bussho Lahn
0
Bussho Lahn

But only his realistic action batch

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Claire Jumper
0
Claire Jumper

The big head is a little creepy.

Reply
Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
MST3K Asked by MST3K
10/1/2022

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?

48%
Catalina Caper

7

52%
Horror of Party Beach WINNER

9

48%
Catalina Caper

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
7 Comments
Mary McDowell
1
Mary McDowell

This episode is a wonderful balance of energetic and dry. The riff deliveries are perfect in tone and cadence. The music in the movie ain't half bad either! I watch this episode to cheer myself up.

Reply
Nathan Fisk
0
Nathan Fisk

Meh - still better than Party Beach.

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Kyle Stockton
0
Kyle Stockton

It's fun to watch people watch the movie get made.

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Ken Prasek
0
Ken Prasek

Creepy Girl! 'Nough said.

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Aaron Mastriani
0
Aaron Mastriani

Catalina Caper has been one of my favorite episodes since I first saw it!

Reply

52%
Horror of Party Beach

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
9 Comments
🌻just🎃chris🍂
2
🌻just🎃chris🍂

The things that don't happen in Party Beach are more interesting than the things that do happen in Catalina Caper.

Reply
Douglas Solberg-Bell
2
Douglas Solberg-Bell

SODIUM. There, I said it.

Reply
Jay Phelps
1
Jay Phelps

Because the Del-Aires need to be appreciated by today's generation for the musical juggernaut they were.

Reply
Joseph Murdico
1
Joseph Murdico

It's a classic and is so campy!!

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Scott Armstrong
1
Scott Armstrong

This HAS to win! It's my desert island episode! Come on people, vote!

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Alex Flores
1
Alex Flores

Never invite Janis Ian to your slumber party!

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Kim VanHooser
0
Kim VanHooser

Sodium and Eullabelle...

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Amber Scaggs
0
Amber Scaggs

I don't know what to choose but I choose party beach

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MST3KaDay On Instagram
0
MST3KaDay On Instagram

Now it's down to the Winners vs. Winners rounds so we're going with the episode we enjoy more, "Horror of Party Beach" though it was a tough choice. "Creepy Girl" is hard to resist but ultimately "SODIUM!" won the day! "Sodium, won't you?" 😁

Reply
Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
MST3K Asked by MST3K
9/29/2022

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?

42%
Parts: The Clonus Horror

5

58%
Horror of Party Beach WINNER

16

42%
Parts: The Clonus Horror

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
5 Comments
One Opinion
1
One Opinion

This movie is one of the rare ones on MST3K: An actually decent movie!

Reply
William Lane
1
William Lane

Sodium. Arch-nemesis of the blood pressure of one Peter Graves, host of Biography. Which we will explore this week. On Biography.

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Erik David Even
0
Erik David Even

I am a big fan of movies that were later ripped off starring Scarlett Johanson.

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MST3KaDay On Instagram
0
MST3KaDay On Instagram

It's our favorite episode.

Reply

58%
Horror of Party Beach

Which episode would you rather see on Turkey Day?
16 Comments
Brian Jay
1
Brian Jay

One, and only one, character is dubbed for no reason! I mean, come on!

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Dave (Comedy) Gold
1
Dave (Comedy) Gold

Every party I've gone to at the beach has been a horror.

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Jeff Pomaybo
1
Jeff Pomaybo

tough one.... but, sodium, of course!

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Heather M Perkins
0
Heather M Perkins

It's not as depressing as Parts. Also, I love me some sodium on Turkey Day!

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Matt T.
0
Matt T.

Exxon training videos are always great!

Reply
Scott Armstrong
0
Scott Armstrong

My favorite episode. Period!

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MarkBergster
0
MarkBergster

The romantic leads are played by siblings, the monsters look ridiculous, I like being told to look Polish, I'm capababull of despising the drunks, and the riffs are magical. Also, sodium.

Reply
Jay Phelps
0
Jay Phelps

For the actress whose entire dialog has been obviously redubbed.

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Kim VanHooser
0
Kim VanHooser

Sodium and Eullabelle...oh, and 40 year old "teenagers" at a slumber party !

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Andy Hartmann
0
Andy Hartmann

Because, you ain't seen nothing 'til you see Tina swing. And that's some nothing.

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David Brian Dobbs
0
David Brian Dobbs

Um, sodium? Need I say more?

Reply
Philip Monihan
0
Philip Monihan

It's the best episode that's come up in this pole.

Reply

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